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PHOTO: Denver, CO 4/20
The time has come to crochet yourself a pot wallet. If you don’t already have a medical marijuana card, you will soon, don’t worry. Better make this now and be ahead of the curve.
Beginner crocheters ought to be fine with this pattern as long as they have a good understanding of how to decrease single crochets. Pretty easy. If you’re a little rusty, just Google it. You have the whole goddamn internet at your fingertips, don’t be lazy. You also need to know how to do a half-double crochet and whip stitch the piece together. Both are very easy, so relax.
I was tempted to use the term, “subversive crochet” in this tutorial, but then I realized, crocheting an applique that resembles a flower or a plant is just about the least subversive thing you can do. I mean, how subversive can it be if it makes your dear, crafty little grandma proud of you? This is an adorable thing to do. Who ever thinks it’s subversive doesn’t get it. Using medicinal plants is the natural order of things. People who try to prevent the utilization of beneficial flora are the ones who are subversive. They’re subverting nature, logic, and reality. I mean, not to be too deep, but you know.
Okay, let’s do this thing.
5 mm crochet hook (H)
Small amount of green worsted weight yarn, I used acrylic here.
Small amount of worsted weight yarn in a contrasting/complimentary color, I used a variegated acrylic yarn here.
A button roughly the size of a quarter.
Yarn needle (if your button holes on the small side, you’ll need a smaller needle too and cotton floss if you can’t fit the yarn through the button holes)
First we’re going to make the marijuana leaf applique. This little thing is easy and quick to whip up and so versatile. Sew them to lapels, pillowcases, scarves, handtowels. Sew one to a conservative Republican’s pajamas while he’s sleeping. Now that would be subversive!
With H hook and green yarn:
1. Ch 2
2. (Round 1) 6 sc in 2nd ch from hook (6 sc)
3. (Round 2) 2 sc in each sc around (12 sc)
At this point I always tug firmly on the back tail of yarn to close the hole in the middle of the piece.
4. Ch 6 going out from the circle—this is the beginning of the largest leaf.
5. Sl st in 2nd ch from hook, sc in next 2 chs, HDC in next 2 chs, sl st in starting sc (final sc of Round 2).
6. St st in next sc of Round 2, ch 5.
- Sl st in 2nd ch from hook, sc in next 2 chs, HDC in last ch, sl st in starting sc.
- Sl st in next sc of R2, ch 4
- Sl st in 2nd ch from hook, sc in next ch, HDC in last ch, sl st in starting sc.
- Sl st in next sc of Round 2, ch 3
- Sl st in 2nd ch from hook, sc in next ch, sl st in starting sc
- sl st in next 5 scs of Round 2.
- Repeat steps 10 & 11.
- Repeast steps 8 & 9.
- Repeat steps 6 & 7.
- Fasten off leaving a long tail for sewing.
Now, we’re going to move on to making the wallet part of the pot wallet. What you’re basically doing is crocheting a long rectangular piece that decreases into a point at the end and then folding and stitching up the sides.
With H hook and yarn in contrasting color:
Row 1: Ch 21
Row 2: SC in 2nd ch from the hook and in next 19 scs. (20sc)
Row 3-Row30: sc in (back loops only) in each sc across. (20sc)
Row 31: Sc first 2 scs together, sc in next 16 Sc last 2 scs together (18sc)
Row 32: Sc first 2 scs together, sc in next 14 scs, Sc last 2 scs together (16sc)
Row 33: Sc first 2 scs together, sc in next 4 scs, ch 4 (button hole), sc in next 4 scs, sc last 2 scs together. (14sts)
Row 34: Sc first 2 scs together, sc in next 10 sts, sc last 2 scs together. (12 scs)
Row 35: Sc first 2 scs together, sc next 2 scs together, sc next 4 scs together, sc next 2 scs together, sc last 2 scs together. (5 scs)
To finish piece, fold the starting chain up to Row 30 and whip stitch up the sides. Fold the rest over the top of the piece to create an opening/closing flap. Stitch button onto the front of the piece to line up with the button hole. Sew the applique onto the back and rock on with your bad self.
Here’s the front. Business up front.
Here’s the back. Party in the back. I Instagrammed the shit out of this as you can see.
Major confession, now that we’re friends. I don’t have a medical marijuana card, nor do I have any marijuana. Instead you can see here that I am using my pot wallet to contain my library card, my membership to Lucille Roberts, and some money. Not pot, but still all very important things.
Also, keep in mind that this pattern is highly customizable. By varying your yarn and/or the size of your hook you will be able to make giant pot wallets and tiny pot wallets. Any and all of the pot wallets, in fact, of which you have ever dreamt. Be open to experimentation! Make it your own!
I hope you enjoy making this project. If you run into any probs, just email me at email@example.com and me and my big brain will set you straight. Happy crafting, ladies!
This article was originally published in Ladybud Magazine on April 18, 2013.